12 Days of HexMas
by shield-maiden
Summary: Wanda's been recieving presents from a secret admirer based on the song Twelve Days of Christmas and she's doing everything in her power to find out who. Final Chapter is up!
1. Patridge Family

Disclaimer: I own neither x-men evolution nor the 12 days of Christmas. Some other people managed to market these ideas before I could. sigh

* * *

Wanda yawned, stretching her arms out from under her castle of comforters and, as though bitten, quickly pulled them back inside. _Why does it have to be so cold?_ Ah, the perks of living in a dilapidated boarding house with four guys and not enough money to pay the bills between them. She gave a silent curse, first towards her father whom she knew for a fact could pay the bills for them and then directed it toward Mystique for leaving them in the first place. It was December, and already, she knew, they'd have a white Christmas, not only outside the house but inside as well_. Maybe the thermostat is just broken and needs to be fixed. _There wasonly one way to find out.

Wanda readied herself as she bundled the blanket around herself and allowed her face to poke out –maybe it wouldn't be as bad as she though- and opened her eyes. "What the heck is that?" She threw her blanket aside, grabbed the offending object, and stormed downstairs: still in her pajamas, which she had once vowed the boys would never see. "TOAD!"

"What," he called back. She followed his voice into the living room and imperiously placed the object on the coffee table. "What is this," she demanded.

"Gee, I don't know," he said, examining it. "But, it appears to be The Partridge Family DVD in a …" he took hold of a dangling tag, "Miniature Pear Tree-said to bring riches to the owner." Toad looked at her, "Who gave you this anyways?"

"I…don't know," she deflated.

"Hey, look," he grabbed a small card out of the branches. Todd made a small 'ahem' noise in the back of his throat that sounded a bit more like a croak before beginning:

On the first of twelve before Christmas

I give this unto thee,

The Partridge Family in a Pear Tree

P.S. I would have given you the bird but it makes the most God-awful noise.

"Hm, looks like you've got yourself a secret admirer."

"Like you," she accused.

"Me?" Todd recoiled, "My love is certainly not a secret…whoever sent you this obviously doesn't know you're already taken, poopsie, or that you hate corny old shows." Todd then finally took in her pajamas and catalogued it away for later before saying, "I stand corrected."

"What?" She gave him a look daring him to disagree, " they're cute _Bewitched_ pajamas. They've got a picture of her wiggling her nose and everything," she indicated the front of her shirt.

"Oh, I'm not saying they aren't cute. I mean, that miniature cape it has is simply to die for."

"Oh!" She hexed him across the room before grabbing her gift and leaving.


	2. Two Turtle Doves

Disclaimer: (in a jouncy little tune) If I had a million dollars, x-men evolution wouldn't have to be canceled! But I don't have a million dollars.

To those of you who expect me to say who the admirer is before Wanda finds out I say: sorry, it would ruin the surprise. You're welcome to guess though. Is it any kind of consolation if I say that if everything goes as planned you'll know by Christmas? Didn't think so.

* * *

The next morning when she found two bird-shaped chocolates in a box on her nightstand she simply plucked the card out from under the box and scanned for a signature. When she found nothing but a poem she tossed it aside and picked up one of the chocolates. Taking a bite she found caramel and pecans inside the creamy milk chocolate. "Turtle-doves…not bad."

She contemplated the ramifications of this admirer's interest. Yes, she would thoroughly enjoy the chocolates and most likely the Partridge Family, the pear tree was a bit off but as long as it didn't suddenly grow ten times its size it would be okay. "Two turtle doves and a partridge in a pear tree." She struggled to remember the rest of the song. "Five gold rings," she exclaimed, "Excellent!" She certainly remembered that one but most of the other verses eluded her. "Something drummers drumming…that could be a problem.

Wanda paged through her mental catalogue of people who would send her such strange gifts. Toad topped the list…sure, he had feigned innocence, but that didn't necessarily mean he _was_ innocent. If it weren't for Kitty Lance would have been next on the list but, since they had gotten back together, he was now at the bottom. Fred, being the only other single male in the house-other than her brother- then became second: sweet, but not her type. That only left her dear brother, Pietro. There was just no valid reason why he would do this to her, he just didn't do nice things for her. And, even if he did, it wouldn't have been in this manner, he would have struck during Hanukah.

"God, I've gone through every guy in the house and still no leads, at least, not towards the guys I'd actually want… unless…unless its not someone in this house." Her mind flipped through the list of guys in the x-men-they weren't technically enemies anymore, which meant she could technically date one of them. It wouldn't be a forbidden love.

Scott-taken by stupid red-haired telepath.

Kurt-dating a human (shudder).

Bobby- available, but she hoped God would strike her down before she became that desperate.

The list went on until her mind came to Jamie-way too young-and then continued to muse over Mr. McCoy-ewww- Professor X –super eww, that'd just be wrong- and Wolverine –way, way, way too old for her. Wanda then promptly told her mind never to go down that path ever again because it scared her too much. No possibility down that road, especially since the only ones she'd even consider were taken.

"Don't even start thinking about the Morlocks," she told herself. "Oh, my God, my dad's little henchmen!" All were cute and single. Sure, Gambit was technically pining over Rogue, but that still left Colossus and Pyro…okay, it left Pyro because she doubted Colossus would even consider dating anyone not from Russia-something about the way he frowned all the time. "Okay then, tomorrow I'm taking a trip to see them. Maybe they'll let something slip that'll lead me to this secret admirer."


	3. Trying to drive me insane?

Disclaimer: Yup, still don't own anything.

* * *

It was a little disappointing when no gift was sitting on her nightstand the next morning but she refused to let it get her down. Maybe her admirer had something better to do the previous night than sneak into her room and bestow gifts upon her. Wanda hurriedly dressed-but took enough care to make sure she looked good-, ate and set off on her merry way.

Always the Grinch of holiday spirit, her father's lair was just as cold and desolate as ever. Colossus was performing yet another menial task that looked unimportant so she interrupted him for a moment to inquire as to the whereabouts of Pyro.

"John? He's probably writing something in the den…is he expecting you?"

"Probably not, but I'm sure it's no skin off his back if I drop by." She gave the Russian a once over to make sure he couldn't possibly be the mystery man. Nope, definitely not.

Saying that John was surprised by her visit would have been an understatement-he seemed downright confused. "Let me get this straight," he told her, "You think I'm sending you merry Christmas gifts?"

"Well, someone is. I'm just asking if you know anything."

"Only that it's not me." He nervously looked around the room. Upon spotting a camera he whispered, "Not only would the boss not permit us to even consider you as a potential Girlfriend, but," he looked the camera straight in the lens and yelled, "You're not my type."

"What do you mean I'm not your type?"

"Don't get me wrong," he glanced at the camera, "you're cute and all, but," he once again looked at the camera and, raising his voice, stated, " I like my sheilas un-spastic, if you know what I mean."

"I'm trying, really I am," she responded, hexing him out of his seat. "Please tell my father I said…never mind, I'll tell him myself."

She stormed into Magneto's office, her eyes ablaze. "Father, are you trying to send me to the insane asylum," she shrieked. " Others I could forgive for the oversight but you know perfectly well that I'm Jewish! Not only am _I_ Jewish but Pietro's Jewish and _you're_ Jewish!"

"Wanda, what are you talking about?"

"The gifts you've been sending me with those stupid little notes. Don't think I don't know it's you."

"I sent you your Hanukah gift last week, remember? Why don't you just go take a walk outside and clear your head? I promise you that this problem will solve itself."

"I suppose you're right."

"Of course I'm right. Now, run along. Daddy's solving the problem of world domination."

"Okay, I'll let you get back to work." She walked towards the door, stopped and turned around. "By the way, why do you have those silly hidden cameras? And why did you tell your Acolytes that they couldn't date me?"

Magneto babbled for a moment before Wanda shrugged her shoulders and left, upon which he let out a sigh of relief.

Wanda did actually take a very long walk. By the time she returned home it was dark. Something smelled delicious as she entered the house. When she found the kitchen empty of occupants as well as cooked food she headed up to her room. The door opened to reveal her nightstand covered by a French flag tablecloth, an Eiffel Tower centerpiece, and three chickens from which the smell emanated.

"Chickens…from France?"

"Technically they're Cornish hens," Pietro's voice piped up from the doorway. He held up a note. "Your admirer said he didn't think there was such a think as a French Hen so you'll just have to use your imagination. Now, let's get this food downstairs because you sure aren't going to be able to pack away three chickens by yourself, even if they are tiny.

Wanda conceded, and as she took another whiff of the chicken her mind suddenly moved Fred to the top of its list.


	4. The urge for Herbal

Disclaimer: Bootstraps' boot straps! Yeah, I still own nothing.

Note: Sorry the chapters are short but since I'm attempting to post a chapter a day I think it's a fair trade off. This one's a bit longer since I just couldn't resist a few extra giggles.

* * *

Wanda awoke the next morning to the sound of chirping birds. _Birds?_ She wondered. _Didn't they all fly south for the winter? _Looking across the room it seemed as though the gift-giver had struck again. Four multi-colored parakeets sat inside a cage. Never being allowed a bet at home (nor in the asylum, which she didn't recall) so she rushed over to examine them as well as the note, which proclaimed them to be "calling birds". _Fred's out done himself_, she thought, brain thoroughly rewired with him at the top of her list of suspects. She quickly changed before taking the birds downstairs, hoping to receive a reaction from Fred.

She called down the stairs, "Guess what Santa brought me."

"A car," Todd guessed. "The guy seems to be able to give you everything else," he sulked.

"Oh, Toad, you knew you never had a chance," Wanda replied.

"Yeah, but at least I had my delusions. Now I can't even entertain _them._ The fourth sign of the apocalypse is here," he pointed towards the birdcage.

"Huh?" Fred looked over at him. "How do you figure?"

"Well, the first sign was that she actually let us see her in her pajamas. Two: she has actively started to seek out a Christmas sweet heart that isn't me. Now she's smiling…and she cares for animals!"

"I think they're sweet," she told him. Then, looking at Fred, "I wish I knew who sent them so I could thank them."

"Well, maybe the last gift will be a picture of him," Fred suggested.

"It's the twelve days of Christmas, Fred," Todd scolded, "the song does _not_ end with a picture of the true love. It ends with twelve drummers drumming."

"Oh," Fred mused, " that could be loud."

"So," Wanda began, taking a seat next to the large mutant, using his shoulder as an armrest, "What do you think I should name them?"

"The birds?"

"Yes, the birds."

"I don't know, Wanda. I'm not any good at that kind of stuff."

"I'm sure you are," she pressed, running a hand through his Mohawk. "Your hair is just so soft; what shampoo do you use?"

"When did she start talking about shampoo," Todd asked.

"When I noticed how shiny and vibrant his hair is and felt the urge to see how soft it is."

"It's, uh, Vidal Sassoon, I think," Fred muttered.

"I use Herbal Essence for oily hair," Todd boasted. He then promptly jumped upon the table and began to sing, "I've got the urge –natural botanicals- I've got the urge for Herbal."

"Toad! Get off that table and never sing that song again," Wanda shuddered, "It's creepy."

"What's creepy is you coming on to Fred," Todd shot back.

Fred looked confused. "You're coming on to me?"

Wanda glared at Toad, "I most certainly am not!"

"Oh, Fred," Todd mimicked, " Your hair is so silky, it's beautiful. And you must be working out because your bicep is huge."

"Leave his biceps out of this!"

"Do I really look buffer?"

"Stay out of this, Fred," Wanda commanded. "Toad, you'd better get your scrawny toad tush out of here before I hex the rest of it off!"

"Well at least I wouldn't have to worry about you kissing it then," he spat.

"God must hate me," Wanda cried out before storming up to her room.

Fred shot Todd a questioning look. "Do you think Wanda likes me?"

"Don't count on it, Fred."

"I knew it seemed too good to be true."


	5. I'm not a psychopath

Disclaimer: "Waiter, there is too much pepper on my popricash. But I would be proud to partake of you pecan pie."

AN: Sorry I didn't update sooner but I had exams, x-mas shopping, and other things that kept me busy. Hopefully I'll catch up with the chapters soon. This chapter I found to be a bit more bitter-sweet than funny, but I like it just the same.

* * *

"Five, go-old rings,' Wanda sang the next morning as she hopped out of bed. She searched the bedside table for a box…nothing. "What? Where are they?" She crawled around the floor checking that they hadn't fallen from their perch. "Why, God?" she asked as she turned her face heavenward. "Never mind, I was mistaken." Five different colored tassels hung from the ceiling, each looped around a gold ring. After a bit of compromising each was freed from its place. A sixth tassel held a note, which she grabbed as well. "Another little poem…that's sweet," she cooed, and turned her attention towards the goods.

It didn't take Wanda long to realize that not only were the rings not made of gold, but they also had a curious look about hem as a strange script wrapped around the outside. Reminded her of…that ring from the movie with the Hobbits… "Lord of the Rings," she judged, "Maybe it's a clue to his identity. Okay, Hobbits, who do I know that's like a hobbit?" Her brain took a quick inventory and came up empty. "Okay, what else…elves, elves were big. That furry blue elf- Nightcrawler!"

Sure, it seemed plausible. She knew from past encounters in battle that he was sensitive…possibly even a romantic. Yes, he did have a girlfriend but her mind told her that compared to this possible clue that was a minor detail. "So, it's off to the X-Mansion I go," she shrugged.

It felt as though she was kept waiting for ever in the foyer before the little boy, Jamie, informed her that Kurt was busy at the moment. "Busy with what," she scoffed. "It'll only be a minute. You don't even have to show me where he is, just give me very clear instructions."

"I can't. He already has company and they asked me to keep people from bugging them. Said something about how there's no privacy."

"Listen you little urchin," she growled, grabbing him by the shirt collar. "I'm a girl on the edge. Some silly boy has been leaving me gifts and doesn't have the common courtesy to leave a name. I refuse to be patient and wait so I'm using my gumshoe abilities to find out. Now, you either show me where he is or I'll tear this place apart looking."

Jamie pointed right. "They're downstairs in the rec room."

"Thank you. You'll be rewarded some day for this unless I can't find you or I forget." She rushed down the stairs so fast she nearly slid down the last couple steps of the way but quickly righted herself and regained her composure. It wouldn't do to look like a disaster.

Wanda walked into the room to find Kurt and Amanda sitting on the couch, their backs turned to the door. The sound of a throat being cleared caused them to jump out of their seats and turn to look at the door. "Wanda," Kurt exclaimed. "What are you doing here?"

"We need to talk." Wanda looked at Amanda and pointed towards the door. "If you don't mind."

"Kurt, what's this all about?"

"I have no idea, Amanda, I swear. But I think it's best if you leave for a while. Wanda's been known to be a bit…demonstrative with her anger."

"I'm not a psychopath if that's what you're thinking," Wanda reassured.

"Of course you're not," Amanda told her. "I'll see you later, Kurt."

"Bye." He waited a moment to make sure she was out of earshot. "Listen, Wanda, I appreciate you arranging that meeting with Agatha, I do, but that doesn't give you the right to barge in here."

"I didn't barge in, Jamie said I could come in here."

"I'll kill him."

"Don't, he's a good kid."

Kurt looked at her incredulously. "So, hwat's so important that Amanda can't hear."

"You should know," she threw a small gold object that hit him squarely in the chest.

"Ow!" He picked it up. "You came here to debate Lord of the Rings?"

"No! I came here to get you to confess you sent them!"

"Now I'm totally confused."

"I've been getting these goofy little presents every day. _You've_ been sending them."

"No I haven't."

"Don't lie, Kurt. I'm much too smart for that."

"But, I'm not!"

"Then what's up with the little 'One Rings'? They were clues, right? So you wouldn't have to go through with the last seven gifts. Not that I blame you, twelve drummers drumming is no doubt expensive."

"Would you stop it? I have no interest in dating you!" He regretted these words as her look of triumph crumbled into a mass of embarrassment. "Wanda, I'm sorry."

"No, don't be. I understand why you don't like me. Why would anyone but Toad like me? There's obviously something wrong with me."

"There's nothing wrong with you. You're beautiful."

"You're just saying that so I won't break into tears."

"No, really, you are. And if I wasn't dating Amanda you'd be the first girl I'd call to accompany me to a school dance."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"Oh, Kurt, that makes me feel so much better," she pulled him into a hug. "You're really soft, y'know that?"

"So I'm told. Are you sure it isn't Toad sending you the gifts?"

She let go. "Positive. He's just not that good of an actor."

"Well, before you go running after someone with what you think is evidence…let me know first so I can talk you out of it."

"You wish, Fuzz Boy. Now that I've totally embarrassed myself I think I'm gonna go home."

"Sounds like a good idea."

"Okay then," she headed for the door. "Did you really mean that about taking me to the dance?"

"Yeah."

"Okay, because I'll hold you to it," she smirked.

"Don't worry, no one in their right mind would break a promise to you."

"Got that right."


	6. Like a kindergartener decorated them

Disclaimer: I like smiling, smiling's my favorite.

* * *

Wanda buried her head under her pillow to drown out the chirping parakeets. _If I find geese in this room I vow here and now they will be returned to their rightful place and I will kill that admirer. _Giving up, she brought her head back out and glanced around. No geese, just a plate of cookies, which up on closer inspection were shaped like geese and eggs. She wasn't even going to allow her brain to think of Fred again as these cookies' decorations were quite rudimentary, as though a child had taken a handful of sprinkles and just thrown them upon the dough.

"It looks like a kindergartener decorated them." Pause. "No…oh no, that little urchin…no way!" She began to pace the room. "There's no way…I barely know him or…he barely knows me. Either way, its not good, he's at least six years younger than me," she sighed. "It never gets any easier."

* * *

"Hi, I'm looking for Jamie…Madrox." The woman behind the counter gazed at her appraisingly. "He forgot his lunch." Wanda held up a brown paper bag, which she knew in actuality contained a couple rocks.

"And you are?"

"His sister…Winnie." She could have hit herself: Winnie? Why she felt the need to like about her identity she'd never know.

"Well, you can leave it here and I'll make sure he gets it."

"No! I mean, no, that's okay. I can run it up. Besides, I forgot to ask him about…something."

"And you're his sister," the woman looked over her horn-rimmed glasses.

"Yes," Wanda smiled.

"Room 310."

"Thank you." She hurried out of there and down the hallway lined with art projects of cotton-ball-bearded Santas and pinecone trees. _Wonder if he made any of these._ Up the stairs she went, searching for the room.

She peeked through the small window in the door and searched for the urchin. There he was, with a huge hard covered book boasting equations like 3x-4y2. "Gosh, that's advanced for someone his age, maybe he's a genius," she said, knocking on the door and receiving a, "shhh" from a small girl passing by. Wanda stuck out her tongue in reply. Her tongue still hadn't been concealed as the door opened to reveal a boy not much shorter than herself who called, "Mrs. Frink, there's someone here."

"Who is it," Mrs. Frink asked, walking over.

Wanda pushed herself through the doorway and promptly announced, "I'm Jamie's sister. There's been some confusion and mother's going into the Operating Room today. I need to find out if Jamie still plans on staying after school for choir." A few snickers slipped out of covered mouths as Jamie turned a bright red. He quickly got to his feet, walked over, and pushed Wanda out the door, closing it behind him.

"What are you doing," he hissed.

"I had something to ask you."

"If you're looking for someone else they're at the High School."

"No, that's not it. Gosh that boy was big for a third grader."

Jamie growled and gave Wanda a shove. "I am NOT in third grade! I'm thirteen years old! An eighth grader soon to be graduating!"

"That explains the math. Turns out you're not gifted, you're just ordinary."

"I have enough gifts."

"Anyways, sweetie, what do you know about duck-shaped cookies?"

"Nothing," he crossed his arms, "And don't call me sweetie."

"You sure?" She pulled the cookie out of her pocket and waved it in front of his face.

"Looks like my kindergarten little buddy decorated that." The look on her face caused him to quickly clarify his statement, "not that he did."

"Jamie, come sit down on this bench, I need to explain something."

"I'm not sitting by you."

"Fine, then stand. Anyways, you realize we can never be together. Your love for me is forbidden."

"Huh? You're more messed up than I thought. I am _not_ in love with you, nor do I know who is. Now, please save yourself the embarrassment and leave. Just so its clear to you: I never want you to come to my school saying you're my sister ever again."

"I understand."

"Just…go. I'm getting picked on as it is." As she watched him go Wanda asked herself why she hadn't called Kurt as requested and saved herself the strange looks. _The need for self punishment_, she shrugged.


	7. End of the world scenario?

Disclaimer: "I can do kung-fu." "No you can't, now shut up."

* * *

Wanda stared mesmerized by the small, white, plastic swans floating around in the blow-up pool, which now sat in the middle of her room. How her admirer had managed it without alerting her she didn't know, but he deserved kudos for it. To save paper he had written his words of love directly upon the pool's edge. A plastic baggie taped to the pool contained a ticket for The Nutcracker. True, the note had read, Swan Lake would have been more appropriate but since it's the holiday season the only theatrical productions were A Christmas Carol and all the ballets were The Nutcracker.

She had never been to the ballet before, and the thought that her admirer might hold the matching ticket to the seat next to her made her almost leap for joy…but the production was two days away, the 9th day of twelve. Which meant she had to wait. Patience not being one of her virtues, she sought the help of the pseudo-supernatural kind.

* * *

"C'mon, Jean."

"No, Wanda, I most certainly am not going to poke my psychic nose into other people's business simply because you're impatient."

"But, Jean, you know that if you were in my place you _would_."

"No, I wouldn't. Do you know how many emotional scars you've caused Jamie?"

"No…do you? Because if you do that would mean you poked your nose into his business."

Jean bristled at this. "As I told you, I don't do that. Wanda, you probably know who's doing this. If I was receiving gifts I'd automatically assume it was Scott."

"So, you're saying Scott's romantic?"

"Yes."

"Do you think he could be sending me these gifts?"

"NO!"

"How do you know? He could be. Maybe he's only bothering with you because he's waiting to make a move on me."

"Wanda, you need help," Jean stated.

"C'mon, Jean, just read his mind and find out."

"He's not attracted to you."

"He could be." Wanda looked about the lunchroom and set her sights on the bespectacled mutant. "Scott, come over here," she called. The X-Men leader was much obliging to do so.

"Hey, Wanda, are you going to school here now?"

"No, just business. Now, Scott, would you say, in your opinion, that I'm pretty?"

He glanced at Jean, "Sure."

"See? I told you," Wanda spat.

"That doesn't mean he'd consider dating you," Jean squawked.

"Wait," Scott told them, "Is this an end of the world scenario where Jean doesn't exist?"

"Sure," Wanda replied.

"Then…yeah, sure, why not?"

"Scott, you've just sold your soul down river," Jean huffed before storming off.

"What was that about?"

"Nothing," Wanda assured him. "She's just upset because I proved a point. Although now I doubt she'll read minds for me. Oh well, back to plan A. You don't like to go to the ballet, do you?"

"Not particularly."

"Thanks, you've been eliminated from my list. Good bye."


	8. Sweets in the house

Disclaimer: So that every babe that weeps at your approach, every woman who cries out, "Dear God, what is that thing?" will echo in your perfect ears.

AN: If I work really hard maybe I'll get out another chapter today.

* * *

Eight Milk Maid Caramels sat on the nightstand the next morning. The note said it would have been nearly impossible to find maids who actually milk cows, let alone fit eight of them with their cows in her room. But, if she wished, he could take her to a farm some time where she, Wanda, could learn to milk a cow. Wanda sighed; some more junior sleuthing seemed to be in order, for where there are eight Milk Maid caramels there are bound to be at least twenty more somewhere in the house. Hopefully they were in the hands of the culprit.

She tiptoed down the stairs so as not to alert her prey. Wanda looked about a moment before Pietro appeared in front of her, scaring her half to death. "Pietro, you have to learn how to walk around the house like a normal person," she snapped, "that or wear a bell around your neck."

"Fine, I'll just try harder to act "normal" around you from now on," he shrugged, taking a caramel from his pocket and unwrapping it, about to pop it in his mouth.

"Where did you get that Milk Maid?"

"Off the table," he maneuvered the caramel around in his mouth.

"But, who put them there?"

"Probably Lance," he swallowed, " He was the last one to go shopping… why do you care anyways? On a diet or something and gonna ream him out for bringing that kind of stuff into the house?"

"No," she spat before hurrying off.

Lance was in the garage, changing the oil in his jeep. "Hey, Lance, you got a minute?"

"Sure, just a second." He grabbed a rag and wiped his hands off. "Shoot," he motioned for her to go on.

"Well, this is going to sound like a strange question, but…do you like the ballet?"

"To be honest with you I've never gone to one, never had the cash to waste, y'know? Kitty's gone before though, want me to call her up for you? Ask her about proper etiquette and all that stuff?"

"No, that's okay."

"Your admirer didn't happen to give you two tickets, did he? Looking for someone to go along?"

"Nope, just one ticket…did you buy those Milk Maid Caramels?"

"Yeah, someone added them to the list. Look, Wanda, if you don't want me to bring sweets into the house any more due to some strange new obsession."

"I already _have_ an obsession. I don't need another!"

"Well, like I said, just let me know and I'll hide the contraband so as not to tempt you."

Wanda nodded, "Thanks," she told him, "That's all I wanted to know."


	9. Common Knowledge

Disclaimer: "You sit on a throne of lies."

AN: Yes, I realize that Christmas has come and gone but I was so busy beforehand with family stuff and then afterwards with my new addiction to Soul Calibur II it took me awhile to realize I had yet to finish this fic. My New Year's Resolution will have to be something like "I promise to never promise how soon I'm going to update because it inevitably becomes a lie." I apologize for the delay.

* * *

On the ninth day of twelve

I've technically already given unto thee

Nine ladies dancing

So what more do you want of me?

P.S. I'll be watching for you at the ballet.

Wanda shook her head. Would this be the gift to end all gifts? Was all of this "twelve days" stuff a load of crap? She'd just have to go and find out.

* * *

Wanda held her trench coat close about her, despite being told of a coat check, hoping she wouldn't be noticed by any of the people around her. The only dress she owned was a shade of pastel pink and felt utterly naked without her usual combination of red and black. She wouldn't have even bothered with a dress if it weren't for the fact that the admirer was going to be there- it was freezing outside with snow everywhere.

She accepted the program from the man waiting at the door to the inner theatre, he even showed her to her seat so she "wouldn't get lost". _Get lost? Please, you just want to make sure I don't find myself a better seat._ The seat Wanda had been assigned really wouldn't be that bad, most likely she'd have no problem seeing the dancers without binoculars.

Wanda wriggled out of her coat and patiently awaited the man she was so anxious to meet she could almost kill him. She had to get up for a moment to let a small, elderly woman past; coincidentally the woman was seated directly to her left. "I'm sorry," the woman clamped her hand on Wanda's arm, "Are you saving that seat for someone?"

"No, why?"

"Oh, its just that my young beau usually sits there. He's a tall fellow, quite handsome if I do say so myself. Do you know him?"

"No," Wanda grimaced.

"Oh well," the woman patted her arm before returning it to the confines of her seat. "Maybe he's decided to sit closer to the stage this year." The woman thankfully left Wanda alone for the remainder of the time before the production, only saying anything when another elderly woman sat to Wanda's right, also wondering what had happened to the "Young Beau". Seats filled up all around her with only one seat open, the one directly in front of her. Wanda glanced around, nervous that he wouldn't show up, that seat had to be for him, it just had to be.

Just as the lights began to dim he appeared, ushered by the gentleman from before. She looked at him and exclaimed, "Piotr, what are you doing here?" Almost instantly, the woman to her left hushed her.

"I'm here for the ballet, I never miss it," he replied.

"Really?"

The Russian nodded. The dancers took to the stage, twirling and leaping about. Wanda leaned over his shoulder and whispered. "Piotr, I'm completely lost, I don't have a clue what's going on."

"Just watch, it will all become clear."

"Okay." She sat back down in her seat. A few moments later… "Okay, that whole wait and see thing is a bunch of crap, I still don't understand anything."

"Don't tell me you've never heard the story of the Nutcracker who is really a Prince."

"No…wait, yes, yes I have."

"Shhhhhhh," both old women hushed. Wanda turned a shade of red as she glanced at their angry faces. "Okay, okay," she whispered, "I'll be quiet." The looks on their faces clearly got the point across that they didn't care what she said, as long as she became silent as the grave.

Click. Wanda aimed her camera for another picture, before being tapped on the shoulder by the woman to the right. "You can't take pictures," she hissed.

"Of course I can. The man never said there was no photography allowed at all, only flash photography, and this camera's flash is turned off."

"It's rude to take pictures during the performance, that's what they have the souvenir stands for."

"You've also told me its rude to talk, so shut up," Wanda snapped. She could hear Piotr faintly chuckling in front of her. "Think that's funny do you?"

"Only a little, now please continue silently watching the performance." Wanda obeyed, hoping she hadn't ruined the night for him. She still hadn't found any sign of the admirer…unless…oh, God, no! It couldn't be Piotr! Could it? Wanda was instantly on her best behavior, determined to show him that she too could be refined. But, could it really be him? The caramels had definitely come from inside the house; did he have an accomplice within the very walls of her home?

Intermission couldn't have come sooner. She hopped up from her seat and waited for Piotr to do the same. He didn't quite pop up from his seat as she had but he definitely rose and walked to the isle. "Come on," he told her, "Intermission is only ten minutes long so if you want to stretch your legs or get something to drink…use the facilities, now is the time."

"Maybe something to drink," she said, following him back out into the hall with the rest of the crowd. She kept her eyes peeled for someone she knew besides Piotr but came up with nothing. There were simply too many people.

As she milled about the people she lost track of time, all she noticed was the thinning of the crowd. That sure made it easier to look for someone else she knew. When the crowd became a mere mingling of people it dawned on her that the intermission had to be coming to an end. She rushed across the room to the door she believed she had come through to find it closed. She glared at the men guarding the door, standing to either side. "Why is this door closed," she asked the one who had earlier led her to her seat.

"Intermission has ended, there's no admittance after the show has started."

"And you don't warn people of this beforehand," she barked.

"It's common knowledge," the other told her.

"Well, obviously if it was common knowledge everyone would know about it. I did not know about it before now, so there's at least one person out there who was unaware of the rule."

"Madam, you can wait over there until the end of the show."

"I certainly will not, because if you hurry up I'll be able to sneak back in virtually unnoticed and disturb the least amount of people possible," she reasoned.

"I'm sorry, but no."

"Fine, I'll do it my way." Her hands began to glow a tell-tale blue for a moment before the door hinges turned the same shade and promptly fell off. The doors them selves began to fall and, though the men rushed to catch them as Wanda took a couple steps backward, reached the floor. "Thank you." She smiled before stepping up onto the fallen doors and walking into the theatre.

Her seat companions' faces fell as she reached their row and asked to be allowed to take her seat. The woman grudgingly obliged with a grumble about an uncultured swine being let into the theatre after intermission had ended. The second half of the play proceeded much the way the first half had. Wanda made herself a general nuisance without realizing it and continued to swivel around in her seat trying to catch a glance of another familiar face.

Wada sighed in defeat before rising to applaud. The only person she knew that was at the ballet was Piotr, which meant she could either embarrass herself or keep her mouth shut. She decided to go with the latter as opposed to the former. Keeping her mouth shut seemed like a good idea in this instance, especially after the fool she had made herself only a few days before. She kindly accepted his offer to drive her home and took part in lively conversation about the performance. A simple "take care now," was all that came out of Piotr's lips when they reached the Brotherhood House.

She tromped up the stairs to her room defeated. She cursed when she managed to trip over the kiddie pool she had yet to empty and deflate. "You'll get yours tomorrow," Wanda vowed to the pool's printed cartoon frogs before collapsing onto her bed.


	10. They're mocking me!

Disclaimer: Yeah, a new year and still nothing changes. In other words I still don't own X-men Evolution.

AN: For those of you who asked for clues there are a couple hidden in this chapter and chapter 9, if you can find them.

* * *

Wanda grumbled as she dumped another cup of water out her window and glanced at the kiddy pool still half full of water. "Those frogs are mocking me," Wanda decided as the cartoon frogs on the side of the pool continued to smile. Wanda pushed down the small goomba pop toy and watched with satisfaction as it leapt into the air. So these little Mario Brothers Toys with the springs and suction cups weren't exactly "lords a leaping" but they sure were fun. She had not a clue where the admirer had gotten them but hoped that she wasn't depriving his action figure collection by receiving them as a gift.

The cup was plunged back into the pool and scooped out more water to be deposited outside. "Y'know, Wanda," Pietro drawled from the door, "there's an easier way to do that."

"Pietro, I affect probability fields, that doesn't mean I can suddenly become telekinetic."

"Back away from the pool. I'll show you how it's done." He spun around, picking up speed as he did so, turning into a twisted gust of wind. The cyclone quickly approached the pool, sucked up the water and flung it out the window. "There, see? I told you there was an easier way to do that."

"Great, next time I need a cyclone I'll call you." She pulled the plug from the pool and watched it deflate for a moment before sighing and preparing two more of the little men to leap into the air.

"Are you still moping about that guy?"

"What guy?"

"You know very well what guy," Pietro told her, taking a seat on the edge of her bed.

"I don't mope," she defended, "but yes, he is on my mind."

"So? Let's figure this one out. Two heads are better than one."

"Why are you being so helpful?"

"Because there's nothing on TV and I'm lacking any form of mental stimulation," Pietro blurted. "In other words, I'm bored."

"I knew you didn't really care."

"If you ever thought anything different I'd think you'd been knocked on the head one too many times. So, let's see…Toad?"

"No way. He'd not this smart and he's not that good of an actor. Have you seen the way he sulks?"

"Okay, so no…um, Blob was a negative, correct?"

"Yes, along with Kurt and Jamie."

"You actually thought it was the littlest X-brat? You're more desperate than I thought."

"Well," Wanda fumbled, "I…I _was_ desperate."

"Correction, you're _still_ desperate. Now, who else did you all alienate?"

"No one, I think…"

"No one? Not even in the tiniest bit?"

"No. Pyro seemed surprised but wasn't upset by the idea, at least not towards me, just towards father's PA system and cameras."

"He has hidden cameras? I wonder where they're all located."

"Pietro! Back to the task at hand. Anyways, Scott's a "no" as is Piotr…I think."

"You think?"

"Well, he seemed more brotherly toward me than romantically interested…Lance is out too, he's just an innocent bystander."

"So, who does that leave," Pietro asked, calculating the possibilities on his fingers.

"The other new recruits- but no way I'm _that _desperate- Remy, who I don't _think_ would be interested and…YOU!"

"ME?!"

"Yes, you, Pietro, if you're doing this as some sort of practical joke."

"Wanda, I didn't, the though wouldn't have even crossed my mind!"

"It better not! Or else," her hands glowed a menacing blue.

"Oh, look, I think I heard Toad calling for some sort of assistance…bye!" He dashed out of the room. Wanda gave a snort. _Figures he wouldn't be helpful._


	11. You Moron!

Disclaimer: "I collect spores, mold, and fungus."

AN: Yup, there's a clue in this chapter too!

* * *

"You moron!" Wanda pitched the CD at Gambit, hitting him squarely on the forehead.

"OW!"

"Did you think I wouldn't figure it out? I mean, you were really smart, very clever actually, to keep me guessing for so long. Quite romantic until you sent me that!" Wanda fumed, pointing at the CD Gambit now held in his hands.

"The Best of Cajun Brass, 11 artists…where'd you get this, chere?"

"From you!"

"Me? Non, Gambit don't own a copy of this. If you don't want it can Remy keep it?"

"Just because you don't own a copy doesn't mean you wouldn't think it's a good present. How many times have girls received pieces of jewelry from their boyfriends that the guy wouldn't wear if you paid him?"

"Good point," Gambit conceded. The CD promptly flew from his hands only to boomerang back at him. "Did I say good point? What I meant was…"

"You slimy, Cajun…snake!"

"Hey now," Gambit defended, "Snakes aren't slimy, frogs are. And if you wand to insult me do it properly; gators are what you need to worry about in the bayou."

"Fine, pond scum," she spat. "Now admit that you've been leaving those gifts on my nightstand."

"Can't do that, chere, because I didn't. If that means we need to fight to the death," he twirled his bo staff.

"No, to the pain."

"Contrary to what you may believe I am familiar with that phrase…Princess Bride, yes?"

Wanda was dumbfounded, "Uh huh," she nodded.

"Well, now that I've rendered you speechless, I'm gonna say this once more. I haven't been sending you any gifts. Now I suggest you go home and get some rest. In any case, you should find out who it is by tomorrow, right?"

"Huh?"

"There's only one last verse in the Twelve Days of Christmas, chere. If he don't reveal himself tomorrow he's a schmuck and I'm sure you'll have enough Christmas spirit to forget about him."

"No, I'm going to have enough spirit to beat it out of someone. Hanukah's over with, I don't have to buy into any more holidays of good cheer."

"Fair enough, just don't come to Gambit to beat it out of, 'cause you've done that already."

"Of course," Wanda smiled sweetly.


	12. Come in Father Goose

Disclaimer: "Oh, if it twere you twould be…tweriffic!"

AN: Yup, this is the last chapter. I'd like to thank everyone who's reviewed and stuck with it until the end. To all those who put the clues together to form a conclusion, I commend you. I've got a few shout-outs so if you'd rather just get to the story skip down past the page break.

Katterree Fengari- The chapter 11 started in the middle of Wanda and Gambit's argument, it is quite possible that she had mentioned it, or that John's a blabbermouth.

ldypebsaby- I absolutely loved your review for chapter 10, it made me laugh to no end.

Ruby631- Although your theory that Wanda is doing this subconsciously I regret to inform you that it is incorrect, although I considered changing the story to work that way for a brief moment because it was such a cool idea.

TheDreamerLady- From what I can tell, you have the distinction of being the first person to guess Toad, even jokingly. And yes, I do kind of follow along what goes on in the comic verse.

* * *

Twelve tin drummers greeted Wanda the next morning, standing at attention, waiting to be lead into battle. Wanda smiled as she picked up the note and read the message:

"On the twelfth day of twelve

I have given unto thee

12 Drummers Drumming,

11 Pipers Piping,

10 Lords a Leaping,

9 Ladies Dancing,

8 "Maids a Milking",

7 Swans a Swimming,

6 Geese a Laying,

5 Gold Rings,

4 Calling Birds,

3 French hens,

2 Turtle Doves,

and 1 Partridge Family in a Pear Tree."

"There's no name," Wanda sighed before crumpling the paper in her hand. "There's no name." She tossed it to the floor before putting on her robe, grabbing a few of the tin drummers and heading downstairs where the majority of the Brotherhood members were no doubt celebrating Christmas, possibly opening the few gifts under the tree.

She took a seat next to Fred who was fiddling with a Walkie-Talkie. "Come in Father Goose," he whispered into it, "Little Red Riding Hood has brought the picnic."

"Fred," Todd's voice came through the receiver, "what are you talking about?"

"Just thought I'd use secret agent talk."

"Well, I don't have a clue what you're talking about, it's too early for secret code."

"Wanda's down here in case you're interested."

"No, I'm not," Todd's voice crackled. "If she wants to wish me 'Merry Christmas" she can come find _me_. Most likely she's too busy looking for Prince Charming. Todd out."

"So, are you still looking for Prince Charming?" Fred watched as Wanda arranged five of the tin drummers on the end table before setting the sixth one in her robe pocket, poking out the top. "You know, he was supposed to give you twice as many as you've got."

"There's another six upstairs."

"Oh, so he wasn't being selfish then."

"Selfish? He's given me plenty, what's a few toy soldiers to him?"

"Because they hold sentimental value to him," Fred offered.

"Wait a minute," Wanda stood up. "Are you telling me, Fred, that you know who gave these to me?"

"Of course I do, those are Todd's toy soldiers. He's got some militiamen in his room with a couple of horse-backed captains and generals."

"Fred, these could be anyone's toy soldiers."

"They could be, but they're not." Fred picked one up and set it in his massive hand. "They're all beat up, see? And if I remember correctly they've got his name written on the soles of their feet."

Wanda snatched the toy from Fred and quickly checked for a name. There, scrawled in black sharpie was written "Todd T." She smiled, noticing the 'd' s were written backward before looking around the room at the other Brotherhood members. "Did you all know," she demanded. Lance muttered something under his breath as Fred tried to explain how Todd had kept it a secret from him but he figured something was up as Todd had gathered up the toy soldiers last night. Pietro just shrugged and gave his usual cocky smile before saying, "it figures it would be him."

Wanda turned to Fred, "Well, where is he?"

"Jack Sprat to Father Goose, what is your location, over?"

"Fred, what are you talking about? I don't think that's the best code name for you."

"Never mind that, where are you?"

"Where do you think I am? I'm outside on the back porch looking at the snow."

"Oh," Fred smiled, watching Wanda dash out of the room, stopping only a moment to hex Pietro's new slippers over to her and sliding her feet inside.

Toad," she yelled, throwing the door open.

"Yes, my Crimson Cutie, I mean, Wanda?"

"_You've_ been doing this?"

"Doing what, because I claim innocence for that weird slime on the bathtub."

"No, this," Wanda tried to hide a small smile as she took the tin drummer out of her pocket and held it out to him.

"Oh, that. Yep, that was me. Who told you?"

"How do you know someone spilled the beans?"

"Because, even if the thought had even entered your mind you would have insisted it must be someone else," he reasoned, "hence your maligning of every guy in Bayville."

"I didn't threaten every boy in Bayville," she sniffed, crossing her arms. "So, why didn't you sign the last note?"

"Because I wasn't expecting anything in the way of a 'thank you' from you anyways."

"Oh. I just have one more question for you. How? Just… how? Where'd you get the money?"

"I called in a favor with that winged millionaire."

"You mean Angel?"

"Yeah."

"He owed you a favor," Wanda looked incredulous.

"Okay, fine, he lost a bet. Right after that whole Apocalypse thing went down he mentioned how he was curious how long my tongue was. I told him it was long enough to grab hold of the top of a street lamp. He didn't believe me so I bet him $500."

"Toad, you don't have that much to your name."

"I did after he lost. The ballet tickets I got from him too, since I figured he could get any seat in the house. Bet him if he stuck his tongue to an ice-cold lamp post it wouldn't stick. After a short argument he decided there was no way a poor guy like me would make a bet I'd lose, so he said _he_ would bet it wouldn't stick. The guy obviously has never watched 'A Christmas Story'"

"So, you got a millionaire's tongue stuck to a pole?"

"No, I got a millionaire's butler's tongue stuck to a pole."

Wanda laughed and before she knew what she was doing she wrapped him up in a hug. "Thank you, Todd," she smiled before giving him a quick kiss on the cheek. "But I never said I liked you," she snapped, breaking the embrace. "Meat. Next year I'll get you a nice box of Christmas meat," she said as she stomped back into the house. Todd shook his head before hopping after her.

The End


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